Rebel Rebel how could they know?

The same but different
I am proud to be a PCM certified trainer. It has been a true learning gift for me at many levels.

I have been contemplating how I can convey the strength of this model without lecturing in my blog. I think the following is a beginning – let me know how I do.

We have two wonderful and amazing daughters. They light up our day and challenge us at the same time. They are hugely different in their personalities.

In PCM speak Edie (2) is base Rebel, Olive (4) is base Reactor.

I would like to believe that without PCM I would have embraced the differences and understood my children in the way that I do. But I know that isn’t true. I know I’m a better more understanding parent and I connect with my children better as a result of PCM.

This would also apply if they were my employees. In fact PCM has had me shuddering at how I bumbled my way through communication with some of the ‘different’ (to me) people I worked with.

How?

PCM gives me the tools to understand what people need, how they like to be communicated with, how they prefer to engage with you in the first instance. It provides a model which allows me to understand the different shifts we experience in ourselves and those around us. It allows me to bring a bit more light into every exchange.

Back to our Rebel.

The Rebel is characterised by likes and dislikes, their primary engagement is fun.

This doesn’t mean their life or work is all about fun but it is what they need if you are operating in a different space and need to get them charged up and contributing towards your own needs.

Edie comes to us with a cheeky smile on her face – effectively saying ‘let’s play’. If we can satisfy that need firstly then she is more ‘pliable’. She constantly brings ‘play’ into the house, but suitably motivated she brings all the other good stuff as well.

One aspect of the rebel also makes her easy to manage providing you understand her. Rebels either like or dislike and there is almost no middle ground. When Edie says ‘no’ she means “NO!!!” and don’t argue.

At the same time this makes her more open to possibility and happy to decide after experimenting (‘I’ll decide, not you’), at times fearless comes to mind.

If we fought these characteristics we would probably perceive an emotionally sensitive headstrong child who we could never fathom. But that is not the case.

We love our rebel child and because we have this understanding we should carry on that way indefinitely. [pullquote]PCM allows me to bring a bit more light into every exchange.[/pullquote]

Have you got people on your team with different personality structures? Of course you have it’s not a team otherwise.

Do some frustrate or confuse you more than others? Of course.

PCM provides a simple yet amazingly accurate and effective tool which let’s you get underneath your preconceptions and biases and connect with almost anyone.

And that is “How they could know.”

(I’ll cover other characteristic personalities and PCM concepts in future posts.)

6 Replies to “Rebel Rebel how could they know?”

  1. Dear Richard,
    I see PCM as perceive, communicate and motivate. I appreciate your idea. It is about understanding others interest and motivating them to their best. Today, connect is the main problem. Problems and conflicts arise because we are unable to connet. This is a human skill and is often result into good performance. Connect avoid disturbacnes and this leads to more concentration and ultimately better performance.I think, if we can connect ourselves with our purpose, then majority of the problems will vanish.I also think that external environment,system, customs play major role to connect or disconnect.

  2. Dear Ajay,
    thank you for your comment. I agree absolutely. In fact PCM is based very much on the way we connect – the mode, the channel etc. It is difficult to convey the entirety of PCM in only 3-400 words, so i am focusing my posts on outcome. I like your comment about connecting with our purpose and I also believe that is very very true. Interestingly PCM looks at getting ‘our needs’ met and meeting those of others.
    Thank you again Ajay for your continuing contributions.
    Richard

  3. On a personal level this reminds me of the challenge as a young teacher of 30 ,8 year olds, every day was different and interesting.
    Cheers
    Karen

    1. Thanks Karen, over here we are very interested in the use of PCM for parenting and teaching. Programs exist but it is getting people to understand the potential. Chrissy is a trained teacher like you and she thinks PCM would be hugely beneficial in that space. Nice early start for you today – :), cheers Richard

  4. Hi Richard,

    I love it – it’s such a great article. I can so relate to that! Having a rebel daughter and a reactor son we do have a similar constellation and everything you wrote, I can tick! When my daughter has to explain things with her whole body – can’t sit still at the dinner table, it’s so relaxing to know the concepts of PCM and understand, that she just has to do that. We argued a lot about table manners during our meals – now I just accept it the way it is and embrace the energy and creativity of my child. Since I now about her personality our relationship improved immensely. Aren’t we lucky to know the concepts of PCM to be better parents, partners, friends and create better workplaces, too?

    Best,
    Margit

    1. Thanks so much Margit. For the benefit of other readers Margit is also a trainer in PCM and in the airline industry, though I’ve just discovered we have children of the same PCM constellation. Thanks so much for your support Margit.
      Regards
      Richard

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